The response to the news that I’m pregnant with a girl has been joy, as well as laughter: ”Whoa, three girls? Now you have to try for a boy.”
Do I?
After the misdiagnosed miscarriage, the hyperemesis, the bleeding, the leaking, and the general drama associated with this pregnancy, I hadn’t given much thought to another pregnancy. In fact, a tubal ligation began to sound like a viable option to me.
But now this refrain—”Try for that boy!”—got me thinking. What if we were dead set on having a boy? Does the medical technology exist to guarantee our results, and would we have the gumption to use it?
I’ve discovered that—in addition to recommendations regarding the timing of sex, positions, and nutrition (which I plan to post about next week)—there are two main methods available at fertility clinics that could increase our odds of conceiving a boy: preimplantation genetic diagnosis (PGD) and sperm separation.
PGD
Undergoing PGD for a boy would consist of an IVF cycle in which any girl embryos we produce would be discarded.
Because we wouldn’t be doing this for any medical reason (such as a hereditary trait only passed down through girls), and because I know what adorable people our female embryos make, this alternative depresses me.
But many of my neighbors are doing it. According to an article published this month in the San Jose Mercury News, some Asian immigrants are opting for PGD, in addition to terminating female embryos. An economist identified a 58% (not the usual rate of 51%) chance of having a son among Indian families that first had two girls . And it’s been a boon for the local fertility clinics who offer sex-selective PGD.
In addition, at up to $18,000 a pop, PGD is significantly out of our price range.
Sperm separation
So, what about sperm separation instead? The most common method seems to be MicroSort. “Ysort”—which, using dyes and taking advantage of the weight different between X-chromosome girl sperm and Y-chromosome boy sperm—gives the boys something of an advantage.
But in order to undergo a sperm-separation procedure, we would have to consent to an intrauterine insemination (IUI) procedure, which would not only take the last shreds of romance out of the conception process, but would cost more than $5,000. In addition, our chances of conceiving a boy would only increase from 51% to 73%, according to MicroSort’s literature.
These statistics were echoed by my doctor, who advised me to stick with what nature provided us, gender wise. Plus, conceiving via IUI with sorted sperm can take longer than conceiving naturally (for couples with no history of infertility), and we are quickly approaching our self-imposed “no babies after 40″ deadline.
If we wanted to guarantee a fourth girl, this would be a much better stead. Apparently, Y-bearing sperm are easier to eradicate, so our odds would go from the usual 49% chance to an 88% chance of conceiving another twirling pink ballerina.
Comments (6)
Maybe it’s because I’m a guy – but my feeling is nothing says “you weren’t wanted” to a second and third girl child more than paying thousands of dollars to manipulate nature for a boy for the 4th child.
Erica–we love you and your G-I-R-L-S and things wouldn’t be the same if you made one of those icky boys.
:)
Good article. I’m all for reproductive rights, but discarding eggs or aborting based on gender seems pretty sick to me. There are benefits to all sorts of gender balances; it’s best to go with whatever happens.
Although I long to raise a daughter and do hope my next pregnancy results in a girl, I also love having my clan of boys and wouldn’t be disappointed with a fourth one. Can’t say I’d be willing to pay anything to increase my chances of one sex over the other; what’s meant to be will be.
does it really matter? why tamper with it?
Back to a previous post…I just had a client that experienced severe wrist issues during her recent, twin pregnancy. She went to four doctors and was not helped significantly. Not wanting to medicate or intervene much with this long-awaited miracle journey, but still with continued pain, she kept searching for a more natural answer. She found a chiropractor in San Francisco who gave her the help she needed. His name is Colin Phipps, DC and he works at Integral Body. Phone number 415-550-9211. Part of the issue he untangled was her yoga practice creating problems in her shoulders and pinching nerves to the wrist. I googled his name and saw 4 reviews of him, all with 5-star ratings. People seem very impressed with his work and intuitive abilities. He specializes in prenatal and postnatal care, but according to the rating blogs, he does other kinds of care also. Love those non-invasive solutions! Hope this helps, Pat